


For Tatsumi Kanji

by drowninginchamomiletea



Series: Kannao Mixtapes [2]
Category: Persona 4
Genre: But I promise I'll make up for it with QUALITY!!, F/M, I hope that's okay, M/M, Naoto doesn't listen to a lot of music, One More Time, QUALITY WAY OVER QUANTITY GUYS, So this one will be a lot shorter than to Naoto was, let's do this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-22
Updated: 2017-07-24
Packaged: 2018-12-05 12:46:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11578362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drowninginchamomiletea/pseuds/drowninginchamomiletea
Summary: Naoto gives Kanji her response.〘PLEASE read part one of this series,to Naoto,first!! They're not standalone fics! They are very much chronological.〙~~~~~~~~~~~~Okay so stuff has happened and I have deleted the lyrics quoted here because I got a copyright complaint so look up the songs yourself for lyrics





	1. Stunned

**Author's Note:**

> Let's go let's do this guys!!! Let's go round this train one more time. It's gonna be good practice for me writing Kanji :)

Tatsumi Kanji was very much not okay. He hadn't slept at all the night before. He had received, and rejected, two calls from Naoto, and he did not read the three texts she sent him. He couldn't bear to see her rejection. He felt terrible about the whole thing and just wanted it over with. 

As he dragged himself out the door of the shop, Rise cried out from up the street and pranced after him. 

"Kanji!" She chirped, latching onto his right arm. "What's got you so down? Naoto didn't reject you, did she? Cause I can deal with her if she did!" There was a very clear threat in her cheerful voice. Kanji shook his head.

"Then what do you have to be so sad about!?"

He grunted.

"'M not 'n th'mood, Rise."

"Did she try to call you?"

Nod.

"Did you answer?"

Headshake. 

"Why not!? Did she  _text_ you??"

Another nod.

"Did you read it?"

Another shake of the head.

"Tatsumi Kanji, why send a mixtape if you won't even hear a response when it's offered!?"

Grunt.

"Humph! Well, I'm going on ahead if that's how you're gonna be! See you in class, Mr. Lovelorn!" She skipped away towards the floodplains. Kanji continued at his slow, miserable pace.

"Kanji-kun!"

Oh, Jesus, no. He'd been dreading this. He decided to ignore the voice, keep his head down, and continue dragging himself along.

However, the source of the voice caught up to him, and he saw a pair of platform boots fall into step to his left.

"Kanji-kun, please! What is the problem!?"

He said nothing. 

"Tatsumi-san, I would  _highly_ appreciate a response!"

He didn't plan on giving her one.

However, she had other ideas. Such as stopping directly in front of him and bending down to scowl up at his lowered face. He was never able to resist her when she started on him like this, but he couldn't bear to hear her reject him. So he screwed up his eyes and side-stepped her, continuing on his way.

But she, bless her heart, had a much broader stubborn streak than he. And she was strong. She grabbed ahold of his right wrist, pulling his hand from his pocket, and pulled him to a stop. He finally looked up at her, pain and frustration swirling in his chest.

"I don' wanna hear it, okay? I said my bit, now leave me be to live in peace! You don' have to tell me, I a'ready know what yer gonna say! I've already heard ya r-rejectin' me enough in my head, I don' gotta hear it fer real! Now lemme be on my way!" He pulled his hand from her grip and walked away. She called after him, but he didn't answer. 

* * *

 

One week had passed since Kanji had delivered the mixtape, and he had worked out a routine for avoiding Naoto. Whenever they bumped into each other, she tried to interrogate him, but he wouldn't have it. 

However, this day, something new happened.

He found a cassette in his shoe locker. 

It was labeled in very even, readable handwriting,  _For Tatsumi Kanji._ He stared at it, baffled. He was sure he recognized the handwriting, but he didn't know where from.  ****

 _I guess... I gotta listen to it, huh? Can' imagine who..._ He shrugged and put the tape in his school bag before changing back into his shoes and walking home. 

 


	2. Gravity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gravity by Sara Bareilles

"Hi, Ma," Kanji called out as he pushed open the back entrance of the shop.

"Hello, Kanji-chan. How was school?"

"Fine." Knowing she wouldn't take this as an answer, he added, "Got a math test on Saturday. Gotta study, so don' bug me!"

"Alright, dear. I'll be here."

He ran upstairs before he could be interrogated any further. He banged down the hall and slammed his bedroom door closed. Hurriedly setting his bag on his bed, he swiped up the cassette player that still sat on his desk. Once the tape was in, he pressed play.

It began with soft piano.

 

_ [Content removed for copyright reasons] _

Kanji sat, confused.  _Hang on. Who is this from again? Who could...?_ He was interrupted by the beginning of the next song. 


	3. Gun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gun by CHVRCHΞS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bringin in backup...

The next song began with a wowing synth and twinkling high keyboard.

_ [Content removed for copyright reasons] _

_Oh._

_ [Content removed for copyright reasons] _

 

 _Well then._ Kanji paused the cassette and gathered his thoughts. The first song had seemed like... Well, actually, _had_ the first song been romantic? It had almost seemed more angry. And this second song... He didn't know what to make of it. He shook his head, sighing, and pulled out his phone.

> Hey, Rise. Can you come over? I need your help with something.

> aawwwwhhhh im sorry kanji-kun but im suuuuper busy helping gramma at the shop right now!! can it wait?? (´；ω；｀)

> Oh, nevermind.

> noooo i wanna help you out!! UGH ill see if i can slip out for a bit!

> Rise! You don't have to do that for me

> Dammit you're already out aren't you

> ٩(๑òωó๑)۶ on my way!!

He rolled his eyes, sighing, and stuck his phone in his pocket before standing and walking to open his bedroom door. As soon as he stepped out, he could hear the idol chirping downstairs.

"Lovely afternoon, Tatsumi-san! Yeah, Kanji-chan invited me over to do homework together! Yes, ma'am, we will! Thanks!" The light _tmp-tmp-tmp_ of her feet on the stairs was precipitated by the appearance of the girl herself, practically sparkling with excitement at seeing her friend.

"Kanji!" She quickly latched onto his arm and started speaking as they headed back down the hall. "So, what does my favorite lovesick puppy need help with?"

Ignoring the slight, he answered.

"Found a cassette in my shoe locker. I'm only two songs in, but I can't make heads'r tails of it." They sat on his bed, and he rewound the tape. 

Once the first two songs had played through again, Kanji paused the tape and looked up to find Rise looking like she was about to explode from mirth. 

"Wassat look for?"

She threw her head back in a full-on belly laugh, barely getting a breath in between. When she finally recovered, she answered his question. Wiping her eyes, she giggled,

"Ohh, Kanji, can't you see? This is Naoto's response to your mixtape!"

He felt his ears burn carmine, and he accidentally shouted when he next spoke.

"Wha—?! Th-then what the hell's it s'posed ta mean!? Those firs' two songs didn' exac'ly sound friendly!"

"Well, why don't we listen to the rest? I'll help translate it from Naoto-ese to something you'd get."

"A'righ'." 


	4. Who Is In Your Heart Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who Is In Your Heart Now by The Studio Killers

The third song started with a snare-heavy drum beat and a dance-esque synthesizer. 

****

_ [Content removed for copyright reasons] _   
  


 

Kanji snorted.  _Relatable..._

  
  
_[Content removed for copyright reasons]_

 

Rise looked over at him, grinning widely. He rolled his eyes.

  
  
_[Content removed for copyright reasons]_

 

"UGH! YEAH, Rise, I get it, my answer t'all that's Naoto! Now stop smirkin' at me like that!"

"Never," Rise replied smugly. "Or," she added thoughtfully, "when you confess to her."

"So, a week ago."

"I mean for real, Moronji! Face to face!" She punched him playfully in the arm. She opened her mouth to say something else, but the next song started before she could.


	5. Parachute

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parachute by Ingrid Michaelson

The fourth track began with a percussive vocal line and clapping in lieu of drums.

_ [Content removed for copyright reasons] _

 

Kanji and Rise looked at each other, eyebrows raised. 

 

_ [Content removed for copyright reasons] _

****

_Well, it's true,_ Rise mouthed. 

"Shaddup," Kanji muttered. 

 

_ [Content removed for copyright reasons] _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *camera moves out Kanji's bedroom window, looking in* *short fade to black*


	6. Good Kiddos Bein Cute υωυ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's call this a wrap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *camera fades into Naoto, standing on the sidewalk below. It is now evening. Tatsumi Textiles and most other businesses have closed for the day. The street is dark, lit only by the glow of distantly-spaced street lamps and the quickly fading light. Naoto is staring up at Kanji's lit bedroom window. (rise isn't there anymore fyi) Her expression is unreadable. Her right hand, deep in her coat pocket, is gripping her phone. She wears her customary blue trenchcoat.*

Shirogane Naoto was thoroughly distraught.

This was a serious problem, because Shirogane Naoto did not know how to manage emotion beyond simply repressing it, which she knew was not healthy. 

"Dammit..." was all she could manage by way of venting. She continued her vigil below Kanji's window. She was unsure what the purpose of said vigil was. Yet she carried it out anyway. She felt like there was something to be done, but what, she knew not. 

 _Go talk to him,_ said Rise in the back of her head. 

 _Unwise,_ she shot back.  _He is likely to still be upset, and making contact would only worsen matters. The fact that he has yet to contact me proves this._

She swallowed a small buildup of saliva and shifted her posture slightly before resuming the near-meditative state of the last hour or so. She blinked no more than once or twice every minute. Her breathing was silent and regular. She allowed only the occasional passing thought to float across her mind. She didn't deign to notice the chill breeze against her exposed neck or the constant rushing of the Samegawa beyond the small neighborhood behind her. 

The main light in Kanji's room turned off, leaving the soft glow of what Naoto assumed to be a lamp. Kanji's silhouette appeared in the window. Naoto didn't worry about being seen; the sky was almost totally dark by now, and the nearest street lamp was at least 1000 feet away. Plus, she was dressed in dark colors. 

He moved away from the window, yet she still watched. Until, that is, the front door of the shop opened. She quickly slid up against a dark wall and let herself shrink into the shadows, just as she'd had to do on many a bygone case while investigating at night. 

Kanji slammed the door shut. He was clearly agitated. He grabbed his face in his hand, pinching the bridge of his nose with his forefinger and thumb. 

"God... Fuckin'... Ugh. I can't do this anymore..." He stormed away, muttering frustratedly, and Naoto followed him, quiet and swift as a shadow should be. She quickly recognized the direction he was headed... Towards her apartment. As soon as he reached the turnoff, hower, he stopped and simply stared at the building. She hid behind a large trash container. 

Finally, he sighed and took something out of his pocket. A second later, a glow burst out in the darkness—his phone. He tapped one or two times before stopping, his thumbs hovering just above the buttons. Slowly and deliberately, he typed something. Within fifteen seconds, she felt her phone vibrate. Ducking behind the trash can, she pulled out her phone. She cupped her left hand around the screen to keep from being noticed by the boy who still stood ten feet away. Squinting at the sudden brightness, she clicked on the notification that read, _21:07,_ _1 New Message - Tatsumi Kanji._

>Hey Naoto. We gotta talk. I'm standing at the turnoff to your building. Want to take a walk?

She paused.

>Y. CRRNTLY WLKNG. WILL B THER IN 1.

She heard his phone chime softly, then snap shut. Slipping her own phone back into her pocket, she stood up quietly. After an appropriate amount of time had passed, she quietly approached him.

"Kanji-kun," she called softly.

He turned sharply to face her, then relaxed when he recognized her profile, and then quickly tensed up again. Wanting to relieve her own tension, Naoto began to walk, and he fell into step beside her. 

After a few minutes of silence rife with things unsaid, she spoke up quietly.

"Why have you been avoiding me?"

There was an extended pause, and just when she was about to speak again, Kanji responded.

"I... I couldn't... I was scared a gettin' hurt. 'M not proud of it. But... Y'know?"

"I'm afraid I don't," she said apologetically. "This is all entirely new to me. I am completely out of my depth. I receive so many letters of affection, yet I have no idea how to respond to one sent by someone whom I know and care about."

"So... So I didn' mess everything up? We're still friends, at least?"

"Of course. I hardly think there's anything I can imagine you doing that would make me stop caring about you. That being said,  _this_ was not something I could previously imagine you doing... I apologize. How... How long have you harbored these feelings for me?"

"Since... Well... The whole time?"

Naoto let out a small breath through her nose and briefly closed her eyes.

"Ah... I imagine my Shadow's revelation must have been quite a shock, then."

"Yeah... Didn' know _what_ ta think. B't... In the end, all I know issat the more I got t'know you, the worse it got. Or better? I don' even know what ta think anymore. Just... I just like ya however you wanna be! You don' gotta force yerself ta do or be anythin' 'cause people just _expect_ it or some shit like that, 'cause that's dumb. I don' care 'bout technicalities or labels, I jus' care 'bout _you._ Ugh! Sorry... Christ, every time I try an' talk t'you, it jus' feels like the words get all jumbled up an' stuck in my mouth before I can say 'em. Can't get a complete sentence out ta save my life, unless it's somethin' real dumb. Dammit, now I'm just ramblin'."

Naoto let the silence hang for a bit while she processed this.

"I..." She trailed off, focusing on the rhythm of her feet on the pavement. Kanji stayed quiet while she constructed her next sentences in her head.

"I... You understand matters of the heart better than I. When I parse out my emotions, I do it from the standpoint of a psychologist, not a... A  _human._ The only way I know to cope with my feelings is to distance myself from them. That was why it was so helpful for me to find songs with simple, pre-written messages to spell out what has been on my mind. But... I can only really get so far by doing that." She shook her head and tugged her cap down, suddenly feeling very, very small. "I... I don't have the emotional processing ability of most other people," she summarized. She thought her voice sounded almost as terribly meek as she felt. 

Kanji looked down at her.  _She looks so tiny... Damn, tha's gotta be hard, though... I can' imagine not bein' able ta figure out mosta my emotions._

A cautious, gentle hand appeared on her shoulder. Forcing herself to breathe steadily, Naoto wrangled her feelings back into submission and pulled herself back up into her mature, professional posture. Kanji's hand slipped from her shoulder as quickly and nervously as it had come.

As she pulled herself together, Kanji watched her out of the corner of his eye. It was like watching a partially crumbled tower being repaired. Straightening up and regaining structure and size, one brick at a time. Finally, she spoke again.

"In any case." She closed her eyes for a moment, and unbidden from the depths of her mind came a wish for Kanji's hand to have stayed on her shoulder. She pushed this aside and focused on keeping the conversation flowing.

"Yeah?"

"Can you... I must... This..." She shook her head. "Why?"

"What?"

"Why... What is it about me? Why me?"

"Oh, Jesus, I dunno... At first? I got no clue. But... Well... Oh, gah, I dunno if I'll be able to say all this..." He took a deep breath. "You're b-brilliant, and you don' take shit from anybody, you don't dance around stuff, you just say it straight, and your laugh gives me the chills, and I love how intense you get about stuff you're really into, and holy _shit_ , _everything_ about you is _adorable_ as _hell_ , like how you pull your cap down when you blush and how you purse your lips and your eyes get wide when you're excited but you don't want to show it, and— _fuck_ I didn't mean to say that last part! Dammit, dammit, _dammit_..."

Naoto, meanwhile, practically had her entire face inside her cap. The burning across her cheeks made her feel immensely grateful for the darkness that surrounded them. _Adorable...? Really? Me?_   _And h_ _e must have paid close attention to notice some of the details he mentioned._ She had nothing remotely resembling an idea of what she should say, but somehow, words stumbled out of her mouth on their own.

"Th-thank you. I... No one has ever... Goodness gracious." She looked away, somehow managing to pull her cap even further down over her face. 

"Y-yeah. Well. 'S true." Kanji couldn't help himself. He smiled softly and tugged gently on the back of Naoto's cap, returning it to a somewhat normal position on her head. His fingers  _ ~~ACCIDENTALLY~~_ ~~~~brushed past her hair as he lowered his hand and _shit_ why does it have to be so  _fucking soft_ he could barely keep himself from going on and on about her as it was, now he had  _another_ thing to add to the already basically infinite list of great things about her, god  _dammit_ was this conversation accomplishing  _anything_ at this point!? 

While Kanji berated himself, Naoto was trying to piece together an accurate explanation of her feelings. By the time she spoke up, he had come to the conclusion that she was going to be the very death of him and that he wouldn't mind it one bit. 

"I believe," she said, slowly and thoughtfully, "that I can give you a proper response now."

Kanji surfaced from the sea of dopamine her presence always summoned and blinked down at her, confused.

"To your... Mixtape."

"W-wait. B'fore y'do that, I... I gotta say it fer real. Just..." He looked down and to the side. He could feel the heat rising quickly and furiously in his face, and pressure building up behind his eyes. They both halted on the sidewalk. There was a streetlamp about ten feet away, and its orange light made Kanji's bright red face look strange in contrast to his hair. The two teens stood facing each other. Kanji took a breath.

"Naoto, I— Oh, _dammit_. I  _love_ you! I jus'— I think everything about you is awesome an' adorable an' just—  _Perfect._ I jus'—" He pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a frustrated breath.  _No. I's still not right, what— UGH!_ With every other option exhausted, he decided it was time to give up and just follow what he wanted to do but never had the guts to before.

He fell almost to one knee and wrapped the tiny detective in a hug. He took it as a good sign that she didn't try to pull away. He barely believed his senses when he felt a pair of thin arms timidly return the hug. A couple moments later, Naoto whispered uncertainly,

"I... I think... I might reciprocate your feelings...?" She hesitated before going on. "I... I feel drawn to spend time with you, and... It was much more difficult than I expected it to be, not talking to you this week." She sighed and nestled her chin into his shoulder. "I do not understand matters of the heart, but I know that I harbor  _something_ beyond just platonic feelings for you. Will that suffice as an answer for now? Kanji-kun?" 

It was a moment before she noticed he was trembling slightly. She pulled away, frowning in concern, but saw a broad grin on his tear-streaked face. 

"Y-yes," he answered, face threatening to split from his uncrontrollably wide smile. "An' Naoto," he added, "jus' one more thing."

"Yes?"

He pulled her back into his arms and whispered the next three words into her ear.

_"Drop the '-kun'."_


End file.
